Friday, December 27, 2013

139.3 - Grinch story: the GOPper and the free lunch

Grinch story: the GOPper and the free lunch

But you had to know, where there is Santa, there must also be the Grinch.

Rep. Jack Kingston, a GOPper from Georgia, has uncovered a terrible scandal.

It seems that there is this program by which poor children - children whose families make no more than 130% of the ridiculously low federal poverty line - which is $23,550 a year for a family of four - can get a free lunch at school!

And he is outraged! He wants them to know there is no such thing as a free lunch! Literally. Two weeks ago, just 10 days before Christmas, he told a local GOPper group that even the poorest children should pay something for their lunch or better yet, they could "maybe sweep the floor of the cafeteria."

That's right, you moocher, lazing about with your free one meal a day because your parents are too poor to pay for your school lunch! Get busy with that broom if you want your bowl of gruel!

What is this, Oliver Twist?

There are some poor kids in our school. What should we do about that? I know, how about we publicly humiliate them? That'll stop them from being poor! They just need to stop thinking that there's such a thing as a free lunch because you know, of course, that's what all poor people believe. They think everything is free, that's why they have so much of it.

Hey, we got us some takers down in the cafeteria! Some kids who think they should live high on the hog just because they're too poor to afford adequate nutrition! I know that makes no sense but if you can find a way that makes more sense out of a twit like Kingston, go right ahead.

Reacting to the criticism he got, Kingston's office released a statement saying "It is sad that trying to have a productive conversation about instilling a strong work ethic in the next generation of Americans so quickly devolves into the usual name-calling partisan hysteria."

Right. Because all poor people are lazy, that's their problem. No work ethic. That's why they're poor. Uh-huh.

Meanwhile, all of the other kids who aren't sweeping floors are, of course, getting a free lunch. They're not paying for it out of their own pockets. They're not working for it. They're just getting the money from their parents instead of indirectly from a public program. What about their work ethic?

By the way, Mr. Kingrinch, we'd love to have a productive conversation about instilling a strong work ethic in every member of the next generation, including, especially, the coddled rich whose very wealth protects them against any real consequences of their actions. We only wish you'd taken part in it.


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